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Sara Zlotnik is a journalist with 10 years of experience and has been a writer in the wedding space for seven years. Her work has appeared in Philadelphia Wedding Magazine, Washington Wedding Magazine, Bethesda Magazine, and The Huffington Post.
Marrying A Marine Requirements
Cherisse Harris is a fact-checker who focuses on lifestyle, beauty and parenting. He has been engaged in research for almost two decades.
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Exchanging wedding vows is an important life event rooted in many different traditions, and a military wedding is no different. In fact, even more rituals can be included if one or both members of the couple are serving or have served in one of the branches of the United States Armed Forces. That said, the experience will still focus on celebrating the couple's bond — there will just be extra pomp and circumstance.
To dive into the most common military wedding traditions and customs, we consulted with experts Bree Carroll, a military consultant and event planner, and Jan Weiss, owner of Annapolis Military Weddings. If you're attending a military wedding in the near future or planning one yourself, read on for the essential information you need to understand and appreciate the experience.
Military weddings should not take place on a military base. Couples can choose the location of their choice, and military chaplains can perform the ceremony outside the base's chapel, according to Carroll. That being said, if you are interested in becoming a separate branch church, be aware that you must meet certain requirements. For example, the Naval Academy Chapel in Annapolis, Maryland, is a prominent Navy wedding venue, but to marry there, at least one member of the couple must be a graduate, active duty member, or active duty military. A member assigned to a geographic area. Note that decorating options may be more limited and the officiant may meet with you for a pre-wedding consultation prior to the wedding.
A couple must decide whether or not to wear military uniforms to their wedding and whether or not they want their attendants to wear them. If the couple wants the dress code to include uniforms, they should indicate this on the invitation.
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For military branches that have many types of uniforms, the wedding season usually determines the uniform. For example, in the Navy, the military uniform changes from blue to white at the beginning of summer. Wise is said to point out that if one member of the couple chooses to wear white, the members of the wedding party should follow suit. Uniforms are not allowed for anyone participating in the Arch of Sabers (more on that in a moment) and that outfit must match what the member of the couple is wearing.
One thing you won't see in military wedding fashion: boutonnieres. "Medals are the only acceptable decoration," Wies says. "If you're wearing something that's not part of your outfit, then you're considered 'out of outfit' - so no boutonnieres."
Any military member attending a wedding must follow the personal appearance code of their military branch. For men, this likely includes a clean-shaven face—unless Carol notes that members are not allowed to shave—and a haircut that doesn't exceed a certain length. For women, Carroll adds, this can include natural nail color, certain hair styling requirements and simple jewelry like earrings. The US Army recently updated and expanded its look guidelines to be more inclusive, so know that more flexibility is possible in your desired wedding day look. Guests who are out of shape do not have to follow the rules of grooming and appearance.
During the ceremony, high-ranking members of the military (captains, admirals, generals, etc.) are given seats of honor behind the spouses' family members. When coordinating a wedding day, Wise often reserves special parking spaces for these distinguished guests.
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At the reception, Carol recommends incorporating "guest of honor" tables. These tables are placed next to the couple's table and include senior service representatives with their families or dates. From there, officers of the same rank and their dates or families are grouped together at a table.
Each branch of the military has its own nuances when sitting down depending on rank and status. For details, Wise regularly consults and recommends service labels.
It is customary at military weddings to display the American flag, as well as the flag(s) of the couple's unit. Flags are often placed on either side of the altar, with the American flag on the left and the Confederate flag on the right.
One of the most unique and well-known military wedding traditions, this particular custom goes by a few names in the US military branches. In the Army and Air Force it is the Arc of Sabers and in the Marine and Marine Corps it is the Arc of Swords. However, this tradition originates from British military customs and symbolizes the military's promise to honor and protect the newlyweds.
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Arch of Sabers takes place after the wedding ceremony and almost always takes place outside the ceremony site if the ceremony is held indoors. (This is especially true if the ceremony is held in a house of worship, as painting or drawing weapons is almost never permitted in a house of worship, although different branches have different rules about whether or not a ceremony can be held indoors. . . .) According to this tradition, six to eight military personnel—they could be comrades-in-arms or local honor guards—stand in pairs facing each other and then cross their unsheathed swords to form a tunnel. The married couple exits the ceremony site through the sword tunnel and gets married under the symbolic shelter of the military. "When the couple passes the last pair of swords, team members throw the sword to stop the pair, and the couple must kiss until the swords return to the upright position," says Carroll. "It makes for a great photo."
It's not unusual to hear the signature song of a service branch at a military wedding. Although many couples choose the national anthem as the recessional song for their ceremony, it is not the only option. "If there are multiple service members from different branches in attendance, a fun way to get a sense of who is in the room is to play branch songs and ask members to stand when they hear them," Carroll said.
Although it's not part of any official canon, there's another familiar tune you might hear, especially at Navy weddings: "You've lost the feeling of love." (Yes, we have
Thanks for that!) Per Wise In a heterosexual couple, the groomsmen usually surround the bride and sing to her at some point after the reception.
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If a member of the couple is officiating, the couple can (and often do!) choose a ceremonial saber for the wedding cake. Typically, a military spouse presents a sword to their partner, and both members of the couple place their hands on the sword and cut the pastry together.
Although not a specific military tradition, a popular idea for a military wedding send-off is to fly American flags as the couple exits the reception. Wiz also had guests write and send well wishes to the newlyweds on paper airplanes. This is a particularly interesting idea for a pilot. When I graduated from college, I planned to be the next Diane Sawyer. My anger led me to a small TV station in the south where I was a general assignment reporter until one day military correspondent Mark Dent quit. I entered voluntarily. It was 1997, long before the start of the longest war.
I grabbed Casper's cobalt blue suit and hurried to the base and checked in with the community affairs officer and met Captain Peter Blake.
Molly and Peter Blake at Yuma Air Force Base, Ariz., in December 2010. Credit Molly Blake
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He was wearing a dark green flight suit that looked suspiciously like a janitor's. We talked about his role in the Discovery Channel program Wings and the plane he flew in it. I bluffed the interviewer - I hope he doesn't notice my naivety about the military, infantry and aviation in general. After that, we politely shook hands, and I returned and walked down the narrow corridor of the squadron. "Do you want to go to dinner?" he asked.
Back if I could
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